Chemistry Is Beautiful, But Is It Enough?:How We Decide

What is Chemistry you ask ?  Chemistry is the branch of science that deals with the structures, properties, and change of matter at the atomic and molecular level. I’m a low key geek and I LOVE science and math. My favorite subject in college was Organic Chemistry. We focused on atoms, their binding properties, covalent bonds, and of course Carbons!! LOL What I know about some chemical properties is that some, when put together smell really good! Some chemical properties when put together make really pretty colors, others combust, and a few are volatile meaning that they vaporize fairly quick.  We humans also have chemicals. We’re made up of them. Ever heard of pheromones? They are the chemicals that are put out by humans and other animals that affect the physical state of others animals in their environment. remember our first love? The person you thought you would be with forever? The person you missed oh so much, the one you texted all day and all night. Now that you have this person in your head think about how that relationship ended up? If you are still with your first love I commend you! But if you’re like most of us youre probably are not.

Sometimes those immediate “crazy in love” feelings aren’t always an indication of the lowngevity of a relationship. However, many people place that as the one of the biggest ‘Must Have’s’ when entering a relationship. All the great sex, the texts, the immediate ‘I love you’s’  are what we become so incredibly engrossed by.  The EXCITEMENT!  I know I did! When I met a guy, and he gave me that immediate ‘oh my gosh feeling’ I just knew that was it ! I was so young and “it” was FAARRR from “it.” We were chemicals! It was all chemistry. Together we smelled good, looked good, we became like these beautiful molecules that intertwined, and made this wonderful chemical compound. But it was so volatile, and unpredictable. In other words there was little to no STABILITY. We had chemistry, and maybe even compatibility. It’s easy to get along with someone especially when chemistry is involved. But neither of the two creates STABILTY.

Don’t get me wrong ! You HAVE to have enough chemistry in order to be physically attracted to the individual. That’s what gets you in the first place! But, YOU HAVE TO BE VERY CAREFUL ABOUT completely  IDENTIFYING WITH CHEMISTRY  WITHIN A NEW RELATIONSHIP. YOU HAVE TO BE VERY CAREFUL ABOUT USING THE CHEMISTRY YOU FEEL AS A COMPASS TO GUIDE THE NEW RELATIONSHIP YOU HAVE. Sometimes ‘love”  “like” “great sex” “the on cloud 9 feeling” can cloud your judgement. Discernment is always key in evaluating relationships, and that only comes from knowing God and yourself. Feelings can be very deceptive, and just because it FEELS right doesn’t always mean that it is. That’s where knowing yourself and knowing God comes in. I personally believe this idea is very important especially when considering marriage. I have enough married friends and people in my life to know that you are NOT always going to feel happy in your marriage. You’re going to argue, fight, you’re going to not want to speak to that person some days. You cannot solely use chemistry adn/or happiness as a basis for a long-lasting real relationship.

I use to have a list of things I would talk , to God about when someone seemed to take interest in me and I in them. Now I did not always follow this rule. Sometimes I forgot to speak with God and sometime I was like ” Yo God this is soooo good. Nah I don’t need your services anymore” But I definitely needed Him LOL. Spend time praying about your feelings and focusing on the person’s character, actions, and intergirty, and try not to be blinded by your feelings.


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